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Current News Humor Current News Humor: 4th Week In Mar. | Current News Humor: 4th Week In Mar. |
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| Thursday, 10 August 2006 | ||||
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REPAIR:
According to a CBS News/New York Times poll, Americans think the U.S. health care system is in need of major repairs. Nine out of ten say the system needs changed. These one out of ten people are the insurance lobbyists. POWER: Al Gore spoke before Congress telling the legislative body that the world faces a true planetary emergency. People will listen to him - not because he was vice-president - but because he is now a movie star. ANGER: The University of Illinois will not discipline athletic director Ron Guenther for yelling at men's basketball coach Bruce Weber and his players during the team's NCAA tournament loss. The University lossed, and they are not doing too well in teaching their students sportsmanship either. Al Gore testified that if we act now, we could still save the planet. He wants to save the whole planet...except Florida. Evidently, he's still a little upset. DESIRE: Miami Dolphins linebacker Joey Porter has been accused of punching Cincinnati Bengals offensive lineman Levi Jones after they trash talked each other at a Las Vegas blackjack table. I'm sorry, but I can't wait to see these teams play each other next season. ADDICTION: This week in 1847, Brigham Young married his 42nd wife. He told his friends before being married that this is the one. OUT-OF-CONTROL: I am so into March Madness that I actually thought about shaving my head and entering rehab. WORST: Donald Trump offered President Bush a scathing attack during an interview with Wolf Blitzer saying that he felt that President Bush is probably the worst president in the history of the United States. Put it this way - The Donald couldn't imagine a worse president even if it was Rosie O'Donnell. President Bush replied with some hair piece jokes. HYPOCRITE: Carol Burnett has filed a copyright suit against the makers of "Family Guy" claiming that the producers violated Burnett's exclusive rights by depicting her signature cleaning-women character in an episode without her consent. I like Carol Burnett, and I think she is fabulous, but I think her show parodied enough commericals and TV shows in her day to be sued 1000 times over. END-OF-DAYS: For the first time in its history, three "Jeopardy!" contestants all fiinished in a tie last week. Isn't this a sign for Armageddon? REPENT: Thieves recently broke into the Guyandotte United Methodist Church in Huntington, W.Va., making off with about $5,ooo worth of sound equipment, a computer, and a keyboard. But then, they apparently repented because the next night, the thieves broke in again giving everything back.  Quote this article on your site | Views: 366 | Print | E-mail
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Lectionary Passages for November 23rd 2008
[Year A]
Proper 29(34)
Sundays after Pentecost
Ezekiel 34:11-16, 20-24
Psalm 100
Matthew 25:31-46
Ephesians 1:15-23
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