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Current News Humor Current News Humor, 3rd Week in April | Current News Humor, 3rd Week in April |
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GOOD NEWS: The DNA tests have proven that Larry Birkhead is the father of Anna Nicole Smith's baby. This is good news. Now the media can go back reporting on the important things. A Florida preacher has become the self-proclaimed chief of the fashion police to stop young men from wearing baggy pants. I don't know where his church is, but I want to send him a donation. ROLE-MODELS: A woman in Chattanooga, Tennessee, has been charged in connection with an altercation at a Little League baseball game where she shoved spectators and used bad language. As with more and more Little League games, the children are becoming the role-models for the parents. COSTS: A Beijing man hopes to rid his city of flies in time for the Olympic Games. The retired restaurateur is buying flies for 30 cents each. I don't think he realizes how costly this endeavor is going to be. STRANGE: The weather is very strange this year. We are in the middle of April and still in middle of winter. I bet this is upsetting Al Gore. DANGEROUS: A 74-year-old Italian grandmother bought a sack of potatoes at her local market recently and found a live, World War Two-era grenade among the spuds. The pine cone-shaped grenade had no pin but was still active. I bet her potato soup is, as my son would say, the bomb. PUNISHMENT: Snoop Dogg pleaded no contest to felony gun and avoided what could have been a long prison sentence. The 35-year-old rapper agreed to five years of probation and 800 hours of community service. I also think Snoop Dogg needs a rap on the snout with a rolled-up newspaper. DIVORCE: A New York divorcee has come up with a solution for failed marriages - a miniature coffin to lay those unwanted wedding rings to rest. Each solid wood coffin has a black velvet ring inserts, a choice of six brass plaques inscribed with the messages "I do not!" and "Six feet isn't deep enough." It costs about thirty dollars which is about all the divorces have left after all the attorney's fees. POWERFUL: Will Smith has been named the most powerful actor according to Newsweek magazine. Smith has taken over last year's winner Tom Cruise who has dropped to number five on the list. I wonder how that happened? I bet his Sci-Fi religion didn't help him much.  Quote this article on your site | Views: 496 | Print | E-mail
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Lectionary Passages for December 7th 2008
[Year B]
Second Sunday in Advent
Isaiah 40:1-11
Psalm 85:1-2, 8-13
Mark 1:1-8
2 Peter 3:8-15
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