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Current News Humor Current News Humor, 2nd Week In June | Current News Humor, 2nd Week In June |
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| Friday, 06 April 2007 | ||||
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SURVEY The latest NBC News Wall Street Journal poll finds that President Bush's job-approval rating is below 30 percent his lowest mark ever in the survey. But, on the other hand, the Albanians love him. UNREASONABLE A Washington judge is suing a dry cleaner for $2.5 million because they lost his pants. Administrative law judge Roy L. Pearson says he wants $2 million in damages for mental anguish and inconvenience plus $500,000 in attorney's fees for representing himself. That sounds reasonable to me. BAD IDEA Britney Spears and Kevin Federline are reportedly getting back together. Am I the only one thinking this is a bad idea. FAMOUS Paris Hilton is back in jail serving her sentence. She is one of the few people who are famous for being famous. And now that she has been in jail, she is even more famous. AVOIDANCE John Travolta has found a new way to avoid the paparazzi by staying up all night and sleep half of the day. The 53-year-old actor told Parade magazine that his whole family has adopted the lifestyle to maintain their privacy. I wonder if he could still be hiding from Horshack. STOLEN The US Embassy in Albania is denying that President Bush's watch was stolen during his visit to the country. It seems that one moment President Bush was shaking hands with Albanians last Sunday while wearing a watch on his left wrist. Moments later, the watch was gone. Shortly later, the watch was offered on EBay - All seven of them. You knew they were all fakes because the watches didn't have a Mickey Mouse face. Police in Marshalltown, Iowa, blame a woman named Butts for stealing toilet paper from an area courthouse. Chief Lon Walker, trying to hold back a laugh as he talked to a TV reporter about Suzanne Marie Butts, said, "She's facing potentially three years of incarceration for three rolls of toilet paper." That's a year a roll, and I thought justice was severe in Texas. I guess in Marshalltown, she is considered the butt the joke. SPOILED Paris Hilton's father is said to be planning a huge party for when his daughter gets out of jail. Rick Hilton is looking for a venue for the bash and even reportedly asked several Las Vegas clubs. And I wondered how Paris got so spoiled. The last time she showed up for jail, I hear she wanted an appearance fee. Tennessee Titans cornerback Adam "Pacman" Jones has withdrawn the appeal of his suspension and will serve the one-year term imposed by NFL commissioner Roger Goodell. A year off with pay - That'll teach him. UNUSUAL A group of Australian companies are selling sand to Saudi Arabia. The construction boom in the desert nation has created a demand for these raw materials. Selling sand to the Saudis - Isn't that like selling refrigerators to Eskimos. "The Sopranos" ended its eight-year run last week in a tense scene at a New Jersey diner where it seemed as though Tony and his family might be whacked. In an unusually-edited ending that's typical of the style of "Sopranos" creator David Chase, Tony looks up to presumably see his daughter Meadow enter the restaurant. And that was it. Eight seconds of silence were followed by the closing credits. Which were followed by irate calls to cable and satellite companies wondering what the heck happened? I am still confused on this one?  Quote this article on your site | Views: 424 | Print | E-mail
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Lectionary Passages for October 12th 2008
[Year A]
Proper 23(28)
Exodus 32:1-14
Psalm 106:1-6, 19-23
Matthew 22:1-14
Philippians 4:1-9
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