Stealing
An Oregon couple were married recently at their home in Portland, and because they were remodeling their kitchen, they requested gift cards from Home Depot instead of traditional wedding gifts. But after the wedding they found only three of the gift cards. The couple suspected the minister they hired of stealing the Home Depot cards. Way-to-go - making the rest of us ministers so look good.

Overweight
According to a new study, twice as many Americans are obese as compared to Europeans. Once again, America is number one.

A study concludes that $93 billion per year goes to treat health problems of people who are overweight. I bet when Congress fines this out, they will put an extra tax on doughnuts and Oreo cookies.

Halloween
A smoker complete with a limb inside was bought by Shannon Whisnant last week in an auction held by the storage company after the owner missed his monthly payments. Mr. Whisnant initially gave it to police, but now wants it back because he wants to charge adults $3 and children $1 for a look. The amazing thing in all of this: people will be willing to pay to see it.

New York Mets Manager Willie Randolph, who despite watching his team collapse in the final weeks of the baseball season has been assured he will keep his job, was spotted this week in the Met's clubhouse without his mustache. Randolph said of his clean shave, "It's not a good time to be recognized in this town." I bet he has already found a Halloween costume. Maybe, it is the fake nose and glasses.

Recall
The internet auction site eBay said yesterday it is sending notices to members listing recalled items, warning they could be kicked off the site and may have to forfeit their fees if they attempt to sell those recalled items. You still can get anything on eBay, just as long as it doesn't contain lead paint.

Custody
Britney Spears was ordered to surrender custody of her children to ex-husband Kevin Federline. I think Britney should have lost custody of her children after she attempted her 2007 MTV Video Music Awards dance sequence. And to think five years ago, I thought she was a perfect teen-age role-model.

Lawsuit
A New York Women is so angry at Apple for cutting the price of the iPhone by $200 that she's filed a lawsuit seeking one million dollars in damages. Only in America, can you lose $200 and sue for $ 1 million.

Resolution
Iran's parliament on Saturday approved a non-binding resolution to label the CIA and the U.S. Army "terrorist organizations." I doubt that -  but you must admit that those Iranians do know about terrorist organizations.

Bothersome
Police say a Minnesota man who reportedly is a "know-it-all" became upset recently after some tree-trimmers failed to take his tree-removal advice. He allegedly took a pocketknife from his pocket, opened the blade and swung the knife. He was taken to jail. He must be a real pest to live with, as some of you ladies know. You missed a spot where you vacuumed. You call these pancakes?  I'd like my drink in a clean glass, please?

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