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Current News Humor
Current News Humor: 1st Week In Oct. | Current News Humor: 1st Week In Oct. |
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| Thursday, 10 August 2006 | ||||
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DIVORCE:
Kim Basinger has been arraigned in criminal court on contempt charges. Former husband Alec Baldwin triggered the criminal case by alleging that his ex is guilty of numerous violations in their ongoing custody dispute. Among Baldwin's allegations,that Basinger blocked his visitation rights and blocked his rights to speak with his daughter. I don't know, but I bet that most of divorce people would love to see their ex's in criminal court, or better yet, right next to Satan himself. MARRIAGE: Anna Nicole Smith and her lawyer/pal Howard K. Stern were united in a "commitment ceremony" this week in the Bahamas. My question is: What is a "commitment ceremony?" I guess that is another word for an engagement. CHILDREN: Last week, children had an honest reason for not eating their spinach. STUPIDITY: A women in Florida was injured recently when she ignited a fire while smoking a cigarette as she filled her car with gas. This is more prove that smoking is bad for you and so is being stupid. An Iowa woman is recovering from the shock of finding a drowned bat in her coffee mug after she sipped from the cup all day. Just how big is her coffee mug? Doesn't this always happen just before Halloween. REMINDERS: An Alaskan jeweler has an idea for the ulimate reminder for men, a wedding ring with a programmable chip that heats up about 24 hours before your anniversary occurs. You marriaged women might want to put that on your Christmas list. WORRY: Tom Selleck may replace Charleston Heston as president of the National Rifle Association. I am not the biggest fan of the NRA, but I will be happy with anyone as their president as long as it isn't Dick Cheney. COMPETITION: A Seattle-area woman has filed suit against Starbucks, claiming that the coffee chain ran her out of business by giving out free samples. She claims that Starbucks ran her out of business through competition. Isn't that the American way? Greed and dominance. Just ask Wal-Mart. Gas no longer costs an arm and a leg-- just a leg, but I would hold off before buying your Hummer just yet. LAWSUITS: We are a lawsuit happy our country. In fact, there is a report called the Stella Awards listing the most silly lawsuit cases of the year. The 5th place Stella Award goes to a person from Texas who was awarded $80,000 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running inside the store. The owners of the store were surprised at the verdict because the child was the lady's son. You do not what to know the other top four lawsuits. Quote this article on your site | Views: 648 | Print | E-mail
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Lectionary Passages for November 23rd 2008
[Year A]
Proper 29(34)
Sundays after Pentecost
Ezekiel 34:11-16, 20-24
Psalm 100
Matthew 25:31-46
Ephesians 1:15-23
Copyright 1992 by the Consultation on Common Texts (CCT). Nashville: Abingdon Press.