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Current News Humor
Current News Humor: 1st Week In Nov. | Current News Humor: 1st Week In Nov. |
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| Thursday, 10 August 2006 | ||||
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IMMIGRATION:
President bush recently signed a bill authorizing 700 miles of fencing along the US-Mexico border. I'm wishy-washy on this issue; you could say I'm "on the fence." ADDICTION: A recent study shows that 11 year-olds who smoke just one cigarette are more likely to become regular smokers by the time they're 14 years-old. I guess that explains the "Joe Camel" ad campaign. ELECTIONS: The next week's midterm elections will be the most costly congressional race in US history. And I bet the oil companies are footing the bill. This election year, the Republican National Committee admits that ninety percent of its advertising budget has funded negative and attacks ads; I'm tired of all these negative ads, and I approve of this message. Oil is now down to $58 per barrel. If my calculations are correct, this means Election Day is this Tuesday. WEALTH: Wall Street workers took home nearly $300,000 on average last year as profits from trading rose. I could do their job just by advising people to buy Halliburtion and BP stocks. FEAR: Stephen King is e-mailing friends and fans urging them to vote. Says King, "If I know anything , I know scary, and giving this president and this out-of-control Congress two more years to screw up our future is downright terrifying." If he writes a book on this current Congress, I am sure he will title it: Greed, Greed and More Greed. BOMBING ON A JOKE: I blow that joke worst than John Kerry could. ATTENDANCE UP AT CHURCH: I look into our congregation, and I know that Daylight Savings Time is over. HALLOWEEN: Halloween week turned out badly for a Wisconsin man who suffered severe burns after his homemade sheep costume caught fire. He was treated and released from the hospital. He went into the Halloween party in a sheep costume and left as a Leg of Lamb. Quote this article on your site | Views: 381 | Print | E-mail
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Lectionary Passages for December 7th 2008
[Year B]
Second Sunday in Advent
Isaiah 40:1-11
Psalm 85:1-2, 8-13
Mark 1:1-8
2 Peter 3:8-15
Copyright 1992 by the Consultation on Common Texts (CCT). Nashville: Abingdon Press.